Hilarious Video Game Glitches

Glitches can ruin a video game. Some give your character two heads—and that can be equally hilarious and terrifying—while others cause sharks to fly in the sky. Many video game glitches make a game unplayable, but there are those few that a pure comic gold. These are video game glitches that improve a game. Your uncle Geekly may play more tabletop games than video games, but he seen enough of these funny video game glitches.

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Heavy Rain: Shaun!
Heavy Rain is an excellent game—it may be more of an experience than a game, but it’s excellent–and despite all its great moments, Heavy Rain lacks levity. Thankfully, one glitch provides some. One of the main characters, Ethan, looks for his missing son in the final act of the video game and it’s this scene where the game’s glitch can be activated.

You’ll have to watch for a dialogue option for “Shaun!.” If you see that the text is blurred, there’s a strong chance the dialogue will be locked for the rest of the act. You can press the “X” button and force Ethan to scream “Shaun!” for far too long and at inappropriate moments like in the middle of dialogue with another character.

“What do you think we should–”

“Shaun!”

“We could try–”

“Shaun!”

I’m pretty sure those weren’t dialogue options, but it was about that bad. Even better, Ethan’s mouth moves every time he yells so this isn’t just an audio glitch.

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Crysis: Land Sharks—Ho!

This one’s very easy to activate. It’s a famous glitch, but Crysis’s land sharks deserve a mention. Go to the beach, take and few steps into the water and wait for a shark to attack.

Once you’ve baited the shark, walk on land, and the shark will follow you, often flying in the air. Sharknado has nothing on Crysis; these sharks are everywhere.

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Skyrim: Basket Head

This glitch may be fixed depending on which version of Skyrim you own, but the basket head lives on in Bethesda glitch infamy. I prefer to play with it to be honest. All one has to do is grab a basket, bucket, or cauldron and place it over the head(s) of any shopkeeper. Skyrim takes line of sight literally.

The NPCs won’t be able to see you rob them blind, but keep an eye on the basket. While they won’t take off the basket, NPCs will shift and do their usual movements and that could cause what you placed over their heads to slip off.

Fastidious gamers can use a wheel of cheese to weigh down the basket, securing it to the shopkeep’s head. Ah, the power of cheese.

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Fallout 4: Trash Can Rocket
As you can tell, I can make a list of nothing but Bethesda glitches. In fact, Fallout 4—at one point—had the same basket head glitch as Skyrim. You can give that a whirl if you want.

Fallout 4 offers the hard to find Freefall Legs (never take fall damage) and easier to find jetpack-equipped power armor for climbing up the Mass Fusion building (the largest building in the game), but the funniest way to climb the building is to pick up a trash can and stand with your back against the building’s wall. It’ll take some practice, but eventually, you’ll be able to jump while looking at the trash can you’re holding. This will cause the player to climb up the wall.

Jump. Jump. Jump! toward freedom.

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Civilization: Warlord Gandhi

I went old school with this one. The first Civilization video game had an aggression level for each AI leader that spanned 1-255. The idea was that each leader had a baseline aggression (toward the player) at the beginning of the game and every action the player took would affect the leader’s disposition one way or the other.

Gandhi was supposed to be the most peaceful leader, so the designers gave him an aggression of 1. That makes sense. But what the designers didn’t do was create an endpoint.

As a result, if someone chose Democracy as their government, it reduces other leaders’ aggression by 2, and since Gandhi has 1 point of aggression and subtracting 2 from 1 makes an invalid negative value, his aggression rolls over to 255.

Yep. Gandhi declared war on me. Oh! He’s talking smack now.

This can only happen late game, so Gandhi nuked me to the Stone Age. After the shock wore off, I couldn’t help but laugh and do it again.

These are some of Uncle Geekly’s favorite video game glitches, but they are by no means the only ones. Are there any video game glitches that make you smile? Let us know in comments, and I’ll make not to tell Jim. Jim not tell you to tell. Comment to us Jim know.

Syntax error. Error. Error!

Shaun!

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Geekly News: November 2, 2018

Elder Scrolls VI Release Window Announced

This bit of news doesn’t amount to much. It’s a slow news week, so eh. Bethesda announced that the Elder Scrolls VI Redfall will be a PS5 and Xbox (whatever they’ll call it) release. That’s pretty much what I figured. I said as much two or three weeks ago; this is just confirmation.

 Starfield may have a chance of gracing current consoles, but there was little to no chance Redfall would make the PS4 or Xbox One. Fallout 76 counts as one of Bethesda’s flagship releases and the company likes to release one flagship title every three or four years. That means that Starfield should come out around 2021—maybe 2020 because they’ve been working on it for 6 years already and 2020 sounds like an awesome release year. Okay, there’s little chance Starfield will be a current generation console release.

Elder Scrolls VI should be released three to four years after Starfield, so that puts its release year at 2023 through 2025. Oh boy.

Guardians of the Galaxy 3 on Hold (Again)

Okay, maybe this is a pretty busy week of news. The third volume of Guardians of the Galaxy may not survive the firing of James Gunn. Here’s a quick recap of what’s happened. James Gunn posted insensitive tweets and was eventually fired as the director of Guardians Vol. 3. Some of the franchise’s actors back Gunn and Disney/Marvel has had a devil of a time finding another director they like. This has led to a stop-start every week or two.

MCU boss Kevin Feige announced this week that the franchise is on an indefinite hold. If the sides can’t find common ground (Bautista has no contract that covers a third Guardians movie), there’s a good chance that Guardians of the Galaxy 3 may not happen at all. Don’t worry. The gang will make an appearance in Avengers 4.

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Boba Fett Movie Cancelled

Kathleen Kennedy confirms that the Boba Fett Star Wars spinoff movie is “100% dead.” While the cancellation of a Boba Fett movie helmed by Logan director James Mangold may upset some, the reason for this move is a shift to the Jon Favreau penned live-action TV series The Mandalorian. I couldn’t see both projects taking off, so a little focus for the Fett man may be in order. Let’s hope The Mandalorian delivers.

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Andy Muschietti to Direct Attack On Titan

It director Andy Muschietti has just signed on to make a new Attack On Titan live-action film adaptation. The first one didn’t land well with manga readers. Why must every movie have a love story—especially when there isn’t a love story in the original work? Muschietti is a big fan of the original manga and if his work on It is any indication, the new Attack On Titan film will get the blockbuster treatment with plenty of chills.

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PlayStation Classic Games List Confirmed

PlayStation announced that it’d join Nintendo with its line of diminutive classic systems with 20 preloaded games several months ago, but this week they announced the full list of games that’ll come with the system. They are as follows:

  • Battle Arena Toshinden
  • Cool Boarders 2
  • Destruction Derby
  • Final Fantasy VII
  • Grand Theft Auto
  • Intelligent Qube
  • Jumping Flash
  • Metal Gear Solid
  • Driller
  • Oddworld: Abe’s Oddysee
  • Rayman
  • Resident Evil (Director’s Cut)
  • Revelations: Persona
  • Ridge Racer Type 4
  • Super Puzzle Fighter II Turbo
  • Syphon Filter
  • Tekken 3
  • Tom Clancy’s Rainbow Six
  • Twisted Metal
  • Wild Arms

A lot of these are classic games or the first game in genre defining series. The PlayStation Classic hits shelves on December 5, 2018.

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Video Games

Taiko no Tatsujin: Drum ‘n’ Fun! and Drum Session! (Switch, PS4)

Drum ‘n’ Fun (Switch) and Drum Session (PS4) mark the first time that a Taiko no Tatsujin game made it to the West. This series is a huge arcade/rhythm game in the East and it’s only a matter of time to see if the States and other countries will take to its catchy beats.

Movies

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Bohemian Rhapsody

This is the big one this week for me. I’m a sucker for biopics and I like Queen. I don’t watch too many biopics in theaters, but I may make an exception for Bohemian Rhapsody, the biopic for Queen front man Freddie Mercury.

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The Nutcracker and the Four Realms

Could this film be so bad that it’s good? I’m not sure. A lot of critics have called it “soulless” and “incoherent,” but the visual effects are good. It sounds like an impressive cast that includes Keira Knightley, Helen Mirren, and Morgan Freeman can’t help The Nutcracker and the Four Realms from becoming Disney’s worst reviewed film in history. Yikes!

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Suspiria

This one won’t be for everyone. If this movie follows the 1977 original, Suspiria tackles some heady material, and its trailer depicts vampires who let the blood flow even more. This lends itself to multiple watches, once to get over the gore and the second to dig deeper into what the film is about, but a run time of two and a half hours may be a little long.

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Nobody’s Fool

This is the latest Tyler Perry comedy. In this one, Tanya (Tiffany Haddish) is released from prison and is reunited with her family. The family learns that she’s in an online relationship with a mystery man who may be “catfishing” her. It’s a fun premise, so I may watch it. It also doesn’t hurt that Whoopi Goldberg, Amber Riley (Glee), and Mehcad Brooks (Jimmy Olsen from Supergirl) are in the cast.

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Bodied

Eminem produces this odd fusion of comedy, battle rap. Eminem has a knack for the theatrical and it looks to continue here. Bodied has received a lot of praise and high marks, so it may be worth a watch.

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Hugh Jackman stars in Columbia Pictures’ THE FRONT RUNNER.

The Front Runner

This one starts early next week. It’s another biopic, this time based on Matt Bai’s All the Truth Is Out: The Week Politics Went Tabloid. In short, it’s Hugh Jackman portraying Senator Gary Hart during his 1988 presidential campaign where he’s caught up in an extramarital affair with Donna Rice.

TV

TheOtherSideOfTheWind

Friday, November 2, 2018

Homecoming (Amazon)

I’ve talked about this one in the past. Julia Roberts stars as a caseworker who helps military members transition to civilian life. Years after she starts a new life as a waitress when a Department of Defense auditor questions why she left the program. There may be more to her being placed as a former caseworker than she realizes.

House of Cards (Netflix)

Today marks House of Cards’ final season. I lost interest a long time ago, and the Kevin Spacey scandal didn’t help, but hopefully Netflix’s first original series ends on a high note.

The Other Side of the Wind (Netflix)

This film may be the biggest thing Netflix has ever produced; it’s one of Orson Welles’s lost films. Being locked away in a Paris vault (due to legal issues) for decades didn’t prevent The Other Side of the Wind from influencing other films that came after it. It all but created the Mockumentary. What’s even better is that Netflix plans to release a follow up documentary on the film’s history which may be just as interesting.

Watergate (History)

History beats The Front Runner (Gary Hart) to the punch with this series about Watergate. This scandal may have marked the United States’ loss of innocence; it definitely gave birth to scandal journalism.

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Sunday, November 4, 2018

Mickey’s 90th Spectacular (ABC)

Mickey Mouse made his first appearance on May 15, 1928 (Plane Crazy), and Steamboat Willie was released around Thanksgiving of the same year. Mickey’s 90th Spectacular is a special that celebrates Mickey throughout the decades.

Outlander (Starz)

Based on the historical time travel book series of the same name, Outlander returns for a fourth season on Starz. The premise sounds interesting and it’s received good ratings, so I may give it a try.

Betrayal Legacy

Board Games

Betrayal Legacy

I may be a little late with this one, because tabletop games are difficult to track down with their new releases. Betrayal Legacy holds my interest with a death grip. Rob Daviau was involved with the original Betrayal at House on the Hill (think of a Joss Whedon’s Cabin in the Woods in board game form) and he adds his patented legacy game mechanism to the mix. For the uninitiated, legacy games are games that change the board through multiple plays, so Betrayal Legacy should play out more like a movie and the choices players make will have lasting consequences.

I may pour a little cold water on this writeup with saying that legacy games aren’t always executed as well as they could be. Gamers may want to wait and read a review (a spoiler-free review as this board game will play like a movie) before purchasing it.

That’s all we have for Geekly news this week. Be kind to one another and stay geeky.

 

Geekly News: October 26, 2018

Iron Fist and Luke Cage Cancelled

I just missed Iron Fist’s cancellation last week, and Luke Cage joins it this week. This may or may not be a sign of things to come with Marvel-Netflix’s shows. Several factors led into the decision to cancel the Heroes for Hire (Luke and Danny). I’ll try to keep this brief.

Disney still intends on beginning its own streaming service soon and is looking to reclaim the licenses of many of their characters; this also incited the proposed Fox buy-out. Netflix ordered fewer episodes of future Luke Cage and Iron Fist seasons as an effort to lower costs (fewer episodes mean less money for the license), but lowering costs means that they would give Disney less money and that makes Disney less interested in maintaining the agreement. But the chief reason may be that Netflix has matured (as a television network of sorts) to a point where they don’t overpay for licenses they don’t need or want, and they’re less likely to continue shows that don’t earn them new subscribers or downloads. Early Marvel shows like Daredevil and Jessica Jones brought in new subscribers, but Luke Cage and Iron Fist struggled.

Netflix still has the license to use Luke Cage and Iron Fist in their shows, so the cancellation of their individual series doesn’t mean that fans won’t see them on other Marvel-Netflix shows. Of course, things could change if Disney insists on reclaiming as many Marvel licenses as possible. The Mouse House could rescind their Netflix licenses or make the premiums for keeping any licenses untenable for Netflix.

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Marvel Game Universe (MGU) Announced

And now for some lighter news. Spider-Man for the PS4 (released last month) is the official launch of an interconnected series of games that will feature Marvel Universe characters. The Marvel Game Universe, or MGU, will function in many ways like the Marvel Cinematic Universe with Spider-Man acting as 2008’s Iron Man.

Rumors swirl with numerous game developers attached to various Marvel properties. Sony’s Insomniac will continue with future Spider-Man games, but they’ll take on at least another character or two, Square Enix (of Final Fantasy and Dragon Quest fame) will produce Marvel titles (and Sony hinted that they may be involved with the larger project), and Rock Steady (Batman Arkham series) has been mentioned as well. I’m not sure who’ll be in the final production line as far as developers, but the main Avengers and stars of future Marvel films are a safe bet for getting their own games, and if the results of future Marvel games are as good as Spider-Man, it’ll be a fun ride.

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Video Games

Red Dead Redemption 2 (PS4, Xbox One)

The long wait for Red Dead Redemption 2 is now over. This game is a prequel to the first Red Dead Redemption (2010) and follows the story of outlaw Arthur Morgan of the Dutch Van der Linde gang. Let’s hope this Western ends in a more positive light.

My Hero: One’s Justice (Switch, PS4, Xbox One, PC)

My Hero Academia gets the fighting game treatment. There’s a strong possibility that I’ll pick this one up on the secondary market. Plus Ultra!

Call of Cthulhu (PS4, Xbox One, PC)

This game will share more with the 1981 pen and paper role-playing game than the H. P. Lovecraft short story of the same name. What makes me interested is that Cyanide game studio contacted the original writers of the 1981 RPG, so this survival horror/role-playing game has some serious roots.

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Movies

Hunter Killer

This one sounds like a good old-fashioned action adventure and that’s okay sometimes. The Russian president is captured and a U. S. submarine must rescue him while avoiding World War III.

TV

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Friday, October 26, 2018

Castlevania (Netflix)

The first season of this Netflix original anime followed the source material closely, but it dragged in a few places. I’m hoping the second season will build on a promising cliffhanger.

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (Netflix)

Sabrina the teenage witch has largely been a comedic character and in 2014, Archie Comics gave her a grittier reboot. I can’t wait to see how Kiernan Shipka and the rest bring this reimagining of the character to life.

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Wednesday, October 31, 2018

Stan Against Evil (IFC)

This series is still on? I kid—sort of—because this series can scratch the itch left by a dearth of new Evil Dead material. I’ve always liked John C. McGinley (“Scrubs”), so I may give this comedy-horror series another shot.

Tell Me a Story (CBS App)

I like the premise of Tell Me a Story. This series takes the world’s most beloved fairy tales and reimagines them as dark and twisted psychological thrillers. Unfortunately, CBS is at it again with making some of its content only available on its streaming service. Ugh!

Board Games

5 Colors

This is an understated card game. The game is played with a deck of 100 cards, 20 cards of each of the titular 5 Colors. Players simultaneously play a card from their hand. The most played color gets scored and each player that played the most commonly played color gains points on the card they played. It’s simple to understand, but once players catch on with how to play, the strategy begins.

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Atlandice

Atlandice has a lot more going on than 5 Colors. This game’s main feature is a rondel (a circular device that changes throughout a game) and in the center of the rondel is a doom clock. Players draft dice and items during their turn, trying to get the most points before rooms get swallowed by a flood and the doom clock ends the game.

It’s an interesting game with a lot going on. I can’t wait to get my hands on it and get a closer look.

That’s all we have for Geekly news this week. Be kind to one another and stay geeky.

3 Lists of 3 Video Games

Good old, uncle Geekly may be more into tabletop games, but he still plays the occasional video game. For all you video game fans, here’s a three lists of three. Hold your anger for the end.

Underrated or Overlooked Video Games or Video Game Franchises

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Persona/Shin Megami Tensei

Persona may gain some traction in the States after 2017’s Persona 5, but this series has been cranking out old-school RPG hits for some time. Each game is a standalone experience that centers around a group of students battling otherworldly evils from another dimension in between class periods. With turn-based gameplay, unique monster designs, and Eastern humor the Persona series is one of the reasons I don’t mind other classic RPGs like Final Fantasy have shifted away from their roots. Persona does a great job of keeping the tradition alive.

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World of Goo

World of Goo is an indie, puzzle game that didn’t set the world on fire like Angry Birds, but its physics engine may be just as good. Honestly, I prefer World of Goo. Players control the flow of goo to an exit point and the quicker a player can do that, the more points they earn. A minimum score is required to finish a level, of course, and like most puzzle games, World of Goo’s levels start easy and grow in difficulty. You also get new versions of goo. You can never have enough goo.

This game has been ported to plenty of newer systems, so it shouldn’t be too difficult to find. It was even a Nintendo Switch launch title.

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Dragon Quest

If you can’t tell, I’m a huge RPG fan and since I live in the states, Final Fantasy dominated the genre. But Dragon Quest is every bit the classic RPG franchise. Heck, if you lived on the other side of the planet, Dragon Quest would’ve been bigger than Final Fantasy. Yeah, it’s that huge.

The art design comes courtesy of Dragon Ball Z’s Akira Toriyama, so the worlds are gorgeous and character designs quirky, fun, and familiar. Turn-based battles? Yep. Random battles? Usually. Dragon Quest knows who their core audience is and does a great job of catering to it. If you get the chance, play Dragon Quest VIII: Journey of the Cursed King—by far one of the series’ best—and look out for Dragon Quest XI which should be out this holiday season.

Overrated Video Games or Video Game Franchises

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Assassin’s Creed

The concept of someone going back in time and inhabiting the body of an assassin sounds neat. Assassin’s Creed does a great job of putting players in a certain timeline. But the story gets too convoluted for its own good and guest appearances by Da Vinci, Machiavelli, and the occasional pope doesn’t do enough to make the story or the characters interesting.

What’s left are some great set pieces, but “Cool, this game has sabres” and “I can kill someone with a bayonet in this one” and “Tomahawks! What?” can only make a game fun for so long.

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The Sims

How has this one lasted this long? I’m fine with the life simulation, but after a while, a player must realize that The Sims is a life simulation. Oh, crap. I almost crapped myself. My sim got too tired and fell asleep on the kitchen floor. Hey, they’re getting frisky under those sheets. I guess that’s entertaining for a little while, but my enjoyment with the series has waned over the years.

Maybe I’m just bitter because I can no longer trick my sim into a swimming pool, remove the ladder so they can’t get out, and allow them to drown. Yeah, I may have issues.

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Warcraft

No, not World of Warcraft, the original real-time strategy game Warcraft. Now, the first three games are classics—well, at least the third one—but one must admit that Warcraft III enjoys most of its continued success due to the mods the modding community has done in the years since its release. Heck, the multiplayer online battle arena (MOBA) genre may never have come to fruition without Warcraft III.

But Warcraft’s story began with some solid character development and with the juggernaut that was World of Warcraft and the subsequent Warcraft relaunch, Blizzard put more attention on character customization instead of development. A craptacular Warcraft movie had gamers flock to Warcraft III, but the story leading up to the third installment was canned, and the third one hasn’t aged well—in terms of story as well as graphics.

Upcoming Video Games to Look Out For

Starfield

Starfield (2019?)

Not much is known about Bethesda’s big space game, except that it’s a big space game that may be in the mold of Elder Scrolls or Fallout. We don’t even have a release date. All I know is that I’m okay with a slightly longer wait for the Elder Scrolls VI if Starfield can live up to Bethesda’s high standards.

Hold on. Did I just say that I’m okay with a longer Elder Scrolls wait? Yep. I’d rather Bethesda not pull a BioWare with Mass Effect: Andromeda.

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Wolfenstein: Youngblood (2019)

Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus flew under the radar in 2017 and that’s a shame. Bethesda did a bang-up job with that one. Wolfenstein: Youngblood will be a cooperative game set in the 1980s. I’m not sure what more to expect, but it looks as if Bethesda plans to stretch their creative muscles.

Huh. That’s two Bethesda games in a row. I couldn’t possibly go for a third.

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Kingdom Hearts III (2019)

I like RPGs, but Kingdom Hearts III is on this list for Season’s sake. She—like thousands of fans—has been waiting 13 years for the next numbered title of this Final Fantasy meets Disney game series. Square-Enix and Disney have leaked some of the worlds and characters. Frozen, The Little Mermaid, Monsters Inc., Toy Story, Pirates of the Caribbean, Tangled, and Sleeping Beauty are some of the Disney properties that’ll make an appearance.

I didn’t want to like Kingdom Hearts because I have a complicated relationship with Disney, but the series works. That many fans can’t be wrong. Right?

Are there any video game series we missed with our lists? Which upcoming games do you look forward to the most? Let us know in the comments.

My Favorite Game Mechanics: Fallout Shelter

Old Uncle Geekly is trying a new trick. This week’s favorite game mechanic comes from video games, Fallout Shelter in particular.

On the surface Fallout Shelter shares a lot of commonalities with other free-to-play games/apps like Clash of Clans. Players download it for free and it offers in game purchases for players to get better at the game faster than they would by investing only time. But the one thing that separates this game from other free-to-play games is also the one thing that makes it uniquely Bethesda. The player competes against the game, not other players.

When one logs off of Clash of Clans or a Clash of Clans clone, logging back in allows them to see what other players did to their defenses while they were offline. This sometimes leads to players paying for repairs (tying up a worker to repair counts as “paying”) and regrouping. There’s usually a tournament included in games of this ilk and only the best players—or the ones willing to pay to win—fair well in these tournaments. There’s a reason people scoff at these games as “pay to win.” The only way to get ahead in a game like that is to pay something. Fallout Shelter eliminates that style of play.

Sure, you could pay to get better things faster in the game, but the only player you can see is yourself. Fallout Shelter allows players to do things at their own pace. It doesn’t apply the pressure of a tournament.

Now I’m not saying that I don’t enjoy the occasional competitive free-to-play game, but Fallout Shelter’s brand of leveling up your vault dwellers how you see fit and sending them out on missions or exploring the wastes fit with Bethesda’s gaming catalogue. This isn’t just a free-to-play game. This is a Bethesda free-to-play game.

Is it for everyone? No. Did some gamers download it because they saw the word Fallout? Of course. Am I a Bethesda fanboy? You know it. But it’s the Bethesda open-world RPG flavor of Fallout Shelter that makes me interested in the game, and I hope other free-to-play games follow suit.

Player versus environment may be my favorite game mechanic, but I promised at least one more mechanism and here it goes. When Fallout Shelter first hit the app store, it bragged about players not having to wait for construction. Again, games like Clash of Clans have players build items and then they must wait real-world minutes or even hours for those items to be constructed. It’s a time waster. Well, you could pay gems (which end up being real-world money) to instantly build an item, but that ruins the idea of “free-to-play.” Fallout Shelter doesn’t have players wait for construction. If you have the resources, you build the room within your vault immediately.

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While immediate construction was a huge selling point for the game, it opened new game mechanisms: push your luck and managing vault dwellers. Players didn’t wait on construction, they waited on their rooms to produce resources like food and water that their people needed.

The more dwellers one sent to a room, the faster that room produced the resource. This is a clever way of adding yet another resource (workers) to the game system. One could also “push their luck” by rushing production in a room. If one succeeds, the game gives them more resources. If the rush fails, the game generates some crisis (radroaches, a room fire, or deathclaws) the player must resolve.

It’s subtle, but the push your luck and managing vault dwellers mechanisms are excellent additions. Come to think of it, they may be just as important as making Fallout Shelter player versus environment.

I guess I had more than one favorite mechanism for Fallout Shelter after all. I’m sure I got lost somewhere while I searched the wastes. If I did, slap upside the head with a radscorpion barb. Or you could always say something in the comments.

5 Great Mega Man Bosses

Mega Man doesn’t get as much love as other classic video game characters. Mario, Sonic, Link and even Samus have enjoyed more publicity and fame. Maybe this is due to the games being too difficult. I don’t know how many hours I wasted trying to time one jump. Perhaps it’s the character design or the fact that Capcom couldn’t decide on how to spell Mega Man (MegaMan or Megaman). It could even be that Mega Man’s enemies are more popular than the original character.

To celebrate the first new Mega Man game in over a decade good old Uncle Geekly will break down five of the best Mega Man bosses from the previous 10 numbered games. These are personal preferences and they’re not even in any kind of order. Seriously, not even in chronological order. Let’s get to these robot Highlanders.

 

Fire Man (Mega Man 1)

Fire Man’s theme music captures the frantic nature of a player jumping and dashing through a hazardous work zone and the industrial robots helping to defend his stage. Fire Man’s look is classic. He almost looks like a robot version of Firestorm. He even thinks he’s the hero, which gives him even more character. The “Flame of Justice” makes for a good Mega Man foil.

Metal Man (Mega Man 2)

I always liked the look of Metal Man’s circular blades cutting through the air. He’s another classic design, but what separates him from many Mega Man villains is his sardonic wit. I don’t know of many Mega Man villains who love tearing down fellow robots. “Sorry. Were you expecting some kind of formal intro first? I’m Metal Man, the robot that Cut Man should’ve been.” Oh! Take that, Cut Man.

Skull Man (Mega Man 4)

His name says it all: Skull Man. He has a skull or ghost motif and happens to have one of the most diverse strategies. While most Mega Man bosses will initiate an attack as soon as Mega Man enters their realm, Skull Man waits for the Blue Bomber to make the first move. His is one of the most difficult boss battles and that makes sense. Skull Man is one of a few robots with combat as their only function. This lack of a life outside combat plays into his character.

Elec Man (Mega Man 1)

I could’ve gone with Quick Man because speed kills in Mega Man, but I had to go with the robot who inspired Quick Man’s design: Elec Man. He’s the original speed demon and electricity boss. As the robot built to control the voltage of nuclear power plants, he was considered Dr. Light’s greatest creation. With that being the case Elec Man is an egomaniac. But in the most sadistic way.

Knight Man (Mega Man 6)

Sometimes you want a robot dressed up like a knight. Knight Man doesn’t have much in the way of backstory, but he’s one of the most unique robot designs in the series and the counterattacks players must time (he’s only vulnerable when he attacks) make his battle one of the series most memorable.

These are your uncle Geekly’s favorite Mega Man bosses. If you don’t like the robots I chose, I’ll challenge you to a duel with some of your favorite Mega Man bosses, or you can let us know in comments.

Geekly’s Free Video Game Summer: September 18, 2016

 

One more week after this one, where did the summer go? Hi, guys, it’s me, Kyle. I’ll get to the games in a bit, but I wanted to remind everyone that I’ll be taking a breather after next week before posting new free video game reviews in the autumn. Jim and I will be ramping up our TV show coverage, and I may need a few weeks to get prepared. Here’s another Geekly Free Video Game Summer post; I wanted to merge tabletop games with video games, so this week’s post will be free video games based on tabletop games.

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Pokemon: Trading Card Game (TCG) Online

Pokemon: TCG Online does a great job of transferring the game from the table to your mobile device. That can be a good and bad thing. There have been countless releases of Pokemon: TCG in the past two decades and Pokemon: TCG Online has samples from many of those releases, which leads to unbalanced power with the decks players construct, especially when you challenge opponents online. Of course you could play block format (only the sets released in the past year) but you’re still subject to opponents who have been collecting cards a lot long than you. When you’re first starting out, you will lose—a lot.

The game also includes legacy (last several years) and unlimited (any card from any Pokemon release) and you’re likelihood of winning a game diminishes with each group of cards you add to the card pool, but you could play with that awesome Wobbufett—if you have that awesome Wobbufett, that is. The gameplay is the classic Pokemon: TCG gameplay.

Players summon Pokemon with one as their main Pokemon and up to five on their bench, should the main Pokemon get defeated. Pokemon need energy cards attached to them to perform their abilities so energy cards are the second most common, and the rest of a deck consists of trainer or support cards that do various things to support the Pokemon on your team. At the beginning of each match, both players draw ten cards from their deck and place them face down, which make up their rewards, and the first player to earn all ten of their reward cards wins.

Okay. Most of you probably didn’t need the gameplay refresher, but it is addictive—as most Pokemon products tend to be. I didn’t mind the trip down memory lane with Pokemon TCG Online. It’s a solid TCG and if you have any interest in Pokemon, I recommend it; you also don’t have to keep binders of cards: space saving idea.

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Neuroshima Hex!

I covered the tabletop game Neuroshima Hex over a year ago (here’s a link) and not much is different with the app version, except that the app makes the game easier to play and more accessible, and that’s always a good thing. Players take command of a faction and the game is played 19 honeycomb grid. Instead of cards, players use hexagonal tiles to denote their forces. Each player starts the game with their headquarters tile with 20 hit points. Players win if they are the first player to lower their opponent’s HQ to zero hit points or if the tile draw pile is exhausted, whoever’s HQ has the most hit points wins.

Players take turns playing tiles. Most tiles are unit tiles. They’ll deal damage on whatever face (of the hexagon) they have a triangle. Short triangles are melee attacks and only work on adjacent units or if the HQ is adjacent. Long, skinny triangles are ranged attacks which hit the first enemy unit (or enemy HQ) in the direction the triangle is positioned. Every unit also has a number which denotes their initiative (how quickly they act); the higher the number, the faster the unit performs their attack. Once the board fills up with tiles or a player uses a combat tile (a burst symbol on the tile), the two armies fight. Units with the highest initiative perform their attacks first and play continues in initiative until every unit gets an action.

And it’s the computer’s calculations during combat that makes the Neuroshima Hex app more enjoyable than the original tabletop game. I almost always forget a unit or two, or an ability. Playing online negates human error, and my brain doesn’t have to crunch as many numbers. Neuroshima Hex packs a lot of game and strategy in a small amount of time (10-15 minutes). If you want a new-age Chess with a faint war theme, Neuroshima Hex might be right up your alley. I highly recommend it.

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Summoner Wars

Oh, this is the game that put Plaid Hat Games (Dead of Winter, and Mice and Mystics) on the map. I enjoy Summoner Wars, and the free-to-play app does a great job of transitioning the game to mobile platforms.

Similar to Neuroshima Hex, players take control of a faction, each with strengths and weaknesses, only this time you’re playing in a fantasy world and you’re a summoner. Summoner Wars’ gameplay is miniatures without the miniatures. You manipulate cards, which represent your units, on a 6×8 grid. You have your customary attack, defense, health, and movement you’ll find in any miniatures game, and most units have special abilities you can exploit. The first player to lower their opponent’s summoner card’s health to zero wins.

Summoner Wars doesn’t try to reinvent miniatures battle. If you’re looking for a more in-depth miniatures game, you’d be better off looking elsewhere, but Summoner Wars is an accessible game for folks who are interested in miniatures as a game type, and it’s fun. If you want to play more than the fire elves, you’ll have to pay money to unlock other factions, but the free version of Summoner Wars offers a lot in terms of strategy and replayability. You may not be able to play as other factions, but you can play against them. This is another game I highly recommend.

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Zombie Dice

There had to be one game I didn’t like in this group, and Zombie Dice is that game. I like the original tabletop version of Zombie Dice (I reviewed it a while ago; here’s a link), but the app version doesn’t measure up to the fun of rolling dice and pressing your luck. The pressing your luck aspect is still present but I tend to not like games that use a lot of dice rolling in a video game, especially when you can tell whether or not the games cheating.

Players take on the role of a zombie. You role dice, which denote humans, and the first zombie to eat 13 brains wins. Now, there are three results you can get on a zombie die: brains, shotgun blast, and footsteps. If you roll brains, you ate one brain. If you roll a shotgun blast, you got shot or hit by a human; you only get three shotgun blasts before you lose your turn. If you roll footsteps, your prey escaped. When it’s your turn you grab three dice and roll them. After any roll you can choose to keep your brain total and pass your turn or you can continue to roll, but if you roll three shotgun blasts, your turn ends, you lose any points you gained this turn (keeping your total for the game), and play goes to the zombie on your left.

Zombie Dice is a simple, press your luck game, but it’s a blast. The app isn’t as much fun. Since there are only three results, it’s easy to tell when you roll far too many shotgun blasts, while your computer opponent tends to roll far too many brains. Hmm. Feel free to pick up the physical copy of Zombie Dice (you can find it at most supermarkets today), but don’t bother playing the mobile app.

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Boss Monster

Boss Monster is yet another tabletop game I’ve reviewed in the distant past (here’s a link), and this is another app that does a great job of capturing the essence of the original.

Players are the boss monster at the end of a video game. You build your dungeon, attract video game heroes to your dungeon, and collect souls. If your dungeon fails to defeat a hero, you receive a wound (or two if it’s an epic hero). If you receive five or more wounds, you lose. The first player to collect 10 hero souls or the last boss monster standing wins.

There isn’t much to add from the original review, except that the Boss Monster app runs slow. The original game can take a while to pay (about 20-30 minutes for a card game, which is a little on the long side), but the extra time it takes for heroes to travel through dungeons in the app makes a typical game run about the same time as the original, and there’s usually only one human character. That’s way too long for a solo-mobile game. I like Boss Monster but the game needs to speed up its processing power. I’ll still keep it in my permanent collection, but Boss Monster is one of those games I have to be in the mood to play. I’d prefer to play the original tabletop version.

That’s one more week down and only one more to go. I’ll try to get some free-to-play MMORPGs under my belt for next week. Let’s end the Free Video Game Summer with a bang. Until next we meet, thanks for reading.

Geekly’s Free Video Game Summer: September 9, 2016

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Hello again. It’s me, Kyle, and I have another week of Free Video Game Summer. I’ll take a break later this month, mid-September is the beginning of autumn, and continue this series as an ongoing free video games post—I’ll probably write posts for this series with less regularity, perhaps once every other week or something—but until then here’s another theme-less Video Game Summer post in which I’ll probably figure out a recurring theme half-way through the post. Oh, well.

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Smash Squad

I downloaded Smash Squad toward the beginning of the summer and waited until a good group of games to pair it with presented itself. There aren’t any. It many ways it’s not your typical free-to-play video game and in other ways it is. Let’s start with what makes Smash Squad unique: its concept. Take a finger flick tabletop game like Flick ‘em Up and merge it with a superhero game where you can upgrade your heroes and you get Smash Squad.

Your squad is composed of pog-like discs. Each of these discs has health, attack, and defense and you flick them (pull back in the opposite direction of the way you want to shoot your disc) at your opponent’s discs. If you take out their discs before they take out yours, you win. Ah, this is such an interesting game mechanism. I love flicking my discs at other people’s discs. This mechanism is done well and it makes Smash Squad stand out from the horde of other free games. But what’s underneath Smash Squad’s shiny new mechanism resembles many other games.

There’s an energy system. Instead of the player not being able to compete for a while, each disc/hero has energy and you can’t play them until they have enough energy to compete. This functions the same way as other free-to-play games, but once you advance in rank and have plenty of heroes, you could play Smash Squad more regularly than you would other games of its ilk.

You can also upgrade your squad. Smash Squad has several levels of items—of varying rarity and cost to purchase with real-world money—that players can use to upgrade their squad. It’s always difficult to see how many crystals, jelly beans, or whatever the item you can purchase is costs when there are odd currency exchange rates. Like many free-to-play games Smash Squad monetizes pain and suffering. You don’t have to spend real-world money, but you will have to wait some time to unlock certain goodies.

Overall, the good outweighs the bad and Smash Squad offers a unique gaming experience. It may not be your thing, but you should give it a spin—or a flick.

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World Zombination

World Zombination is a tower defense game that allows players to control either the humans, the defense, or zombies, the horde of enemies. Let’s face it, you’re going to want to play as the zombies. No offense to the humans—they’re already on the defensive—but few games allow you to play as zombies or as the enemy horde attacking the tower defense. I did play as the humans as well as the zombies, and World Zombination does a good job of presenting a tower defense game with a twist: your towers move. But the zombie side of things makes this game shine.

You get to load out your zombie power-ups and deploy your horde in strategic places to overwhelm those pesky humans. While it can be satisfying to fight off the zombie horde, it was more satisfying to gobble up brains. Ultimately there’s little difference between the two sides. You get a lot of the same power-ups. The objective is the only thing that changes when you go from human to zombie or vice versa. But it’s the objective that makes playing as the zombies unique.

Now, World Zombination has a lot of the same things we see in other free-to-play games: wait times for power-ups, hard to obtain in-game currency that tempts players to spend real money, and energy recharging that can be cut down if you use the same hard to obtain in-game currency. You’ll have to be patient, or be willing to spend real money, but World Zombination provides a singular tower defense experience, especially when you factor in player-versus-player game modes.

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Batman: Arkham Underworld

Okay. I just said that no other tower defense game besides World Zombination allows you to play as the enemy horde. Well, Batman: Arkham Underworld does that, too. In fact, Batman: Arkham Underworld plays a lot like World Zombination with a different theme and skin. This time, you play as Batman’s rogues.

Batman: Arkham Underworld isn’t a bad game, it provides an experience similar to World Zombination, but Batman’s rogues as a theme doesn’t work as well as a zombie horde. It’s one thing to unlock a new zombie type and power them up. It’s another when the game treats Batman’s rogues like World Zombination treats its zombies; they aren’t unique enough to justify the theme. Batman: Arkham Underworld plays like your controlling a zombie horde masquerading as Batman’s rogues’ gallery.

Batman: Arkham Underworld has many of World Zombination’s features, and you can find some solid game play. It’s not as if Batman: Arkham Underworld is a bad game; the theme doesn’t match the game mechanism. Still, if you like Batman and enjoy the idea of a playing as the side seldom played in a tower defense game, you may like Batman: Arkham Underworld. And it’d be redundant to have both Batman: Arkham Underworld and World Zombination.

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Ghostbusters: Slime City

Ghostbusters: Slime City cashes in on the summer blockbuster Ghostbusters, but you won’t find many of the characters from the original movie or the reboot—human characters that is; Slimer and the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man make appearances. Ghostbusters: Slime City has the most action of any game I’ve covered so far, but it maintains the level-up aspects of your equipment as well as your headquarters and a bank, and I’m not sure the mini-games make much sense.

Beyond the weird mini-games like feeding Slimer hot dogs and gaining money, the core game play is busting a bunch a ghosts by pointing and swiping on your touch screen. Your ghostbuster will run out of power and you have to take your finger off your screen for them to recharge their battery and when you have power, you continue to point and swipe. At random moments you’ll trap ghosts—I’m not sure how the game determines which ghosts you trap—but most ghosts are blasted with your proton ray. You get a few minutes to bust the target number of ghosts you need to bust and then you either beat the level or have to replay it. Ghostbusters: Slime City is a straightforward game. It doesn’t add any new game play or offer an engaging story—although there is one the game shoe horns into the gameplay—but if you like Ghostbusters and busting makes you feel good, you may want to give Ghostbusters: Slime City. This game doesn’t cover enough new ground to be staying in my permanent collection.

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Spider-Man Unlimited

Spider-Man Unlimited is Temple Run with a Spider-Man skin. There’s nothing wrong with that premise. In fact, Spider-Man Unlimited does a great job of incorporating new game mechanisms to the Temple Run model that are suited to Spider-Man. Web slinging is fantastic. Battling enemies is intuitive but challenging. And the dynamic level generation keeps players on their toes.

That last point can be a good or bad thing. I like being challenged by a game, even if it’s a free-to-play game, but you can get stuck on a level for a really long time and instead of being able to memorize what’s going to show up next on a map, because you died several times on a stage, Spider-Man Unlimited does a good job of changing up the level each time. You could be fighting enemies and dodging obstacles one play through of a stage, only to be web slinging the next time.

A free-to-play game wouldn’t make money without having power-ups, enhancements, and boosts for your heroes, and Spider-Man Unlimited uses the customary difficult to obtain in-game currency, energy recharge times, and the like. Again, you can spend a lot of money getting through things—and Spider-Man Unlimited can be frustrating enough to make you want to spend money—or you could be patient and clear the level without spending money.

Regardless, Spider-Man Unlimited adds enough to the Temple Run formula to make it uniquely Spidey, fresh, and worth a quick play.

All right. We’re almost done with Free Video Game Summer. Until next we meet, thanks for reading.

Geekly’s Free Video Game Summer: September 2, 2016

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Hello. We don’t have a theme for this week’s Free Video Game Summer. There’s just a lot of small games. That means that these reviews won’t be too long—for the most part—so let’s get to it.

PocketPolitics

Pocket Politics

Pocket Politics uses the same set up as Kongregate’s previous game, AdVenture Capitalist. I reviewed AdVenture Capitalist earlier this summer and liked it, but that was the PC version of the game, which is the far superior version of the game. I downloaded the iTunes app and there were more stumbling blocks in terms of ploys to gain people’s money and these schemes rear their heads here in Pocket Politics.

Looking beyond these money-making practices, the main game mechanisms from AdVenture Capitalist are still in place. You tap businesses to open them and generate money, hire managers to tap businesses for you, and purchase upgrades to boost your earnings. This set-up worked for AdVenture Capitalist because it matches the game’s theme. The same can’t be said of Pocket Politics. Most people know that money talks in politics, but it’s not the one-for-one of the original and these same game mechanisms fall flat even before you factor in the shady ways power-ups work. Play AdVenture Capitalist on the PC and skip Pocket Politics.

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Big Bang Racing

Big Bang Racing is a fun little racing game in the mode of Mod Nation Racers or Little Big Planet Karting. The controls aren’t as good as a 3D racing game—this is a side-scrolling racing game—but they’re also not too difficult to pick up and master either. Where Big Bang Racing shines is in its customization.

Not only can you trick out your cart, you can create your own levels and play levels designed by your friends. This makes for endless content. And with a global community, you’ll find hours of enjoyment. Big Bang Racing isn’t for everyone. There are plenty of other games that capture the adrenaline of pedal to the metal racing, and I would’ve preferred some power ups besides turbo boost (there may be more if I were to play longer) but for a free, kart racing game, you can’t go wrong with Big Bang Racing.

Snakebird

Snakebird

Snakebird gets its name from the titular character who’s a gooey amalgam of a snake and a bird. At its heart Snakebird is a puzzle game. You navigate levels by sliding your snakebird over hills and into caves. It’s a simple and fun concept, but the game can get frustrating.

There’s no hint system that I could find, so players could spend hours—days if you take breaks—on a stage before clearing the level. That’s not a deal breaker for me, but it could be for many other people. In fact, Snakebird doesn’t waste much time before plunging its players into difficult to solve puzzles. It can be brutal game, so beware. But if you can get pass its unforgiving puzzles, Snakebird can be fun.

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Winter Fugitives 2 Chronicles

Like Big Bang, Winter Fugitives 2 Chronicles is another simplified version of a popular game type: stealth. If you like sneaking around in Thief or Metal Gear Solid, you might enjoy the stripped down Winter Fugitives 2 Chronicles. Players control a prisoner trying to escape. You have to avoid guards (who have cones of vision you must side-step) and look for the occasional key, found in desks, safes, or crates. You have the option of knocking out guards and subduing them, but you run the risk of not gaining the level’s bonus, and you typically want the bonus. Other than that, there isn’t a lot of complexity to Winter Fugitives 2 Chronicles. Try not to be seen. The gameplay is tight and it can scratch the itch of a free-to-play stealth, mobile game.

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Jelly Jump

Jelly Jump is another game with a simple concept. Players control a jelly cube and must jump (tap the cube) at the right time to make to the level above them; instead of side scrolling, Jelly Jump top scrolls. You only have a short time to make your jump because you may get closed off from the level above you (draw bridges) and water is filling the bottom of the screen. It’s a fun little game.

You could pay $1.99 and eliminate ads that periodically show up, but the ads in Jelly Jump aren’t obtrusive, you can get by with the free version. The gameplay may be simple but it can be intense. Several times I got my jelly cube stuck in a draw bridge and frantically tapped the screen to free it. It’s odd how a simple game can elicit a response like that. For a little game Jelly Jump can get your blood pumping, and it’s worth a quick play.

PowerHover

Power Hover

Power Hover puts you in control of a guy on a hover board, restoring power to the countryside. Each stage has you swiping to avoid obstacles and pick up electricity. If you collect enough electricity, you can power up the local power stations and people regain their electric power. This is yet another simple concept game, but Power Hover does a good job of providing tight controls and gameplay, and players know what they’re doing and why they’re doing it. That’s always a plus.

While Power Hover isn’t as deep as Big Bang—few free-to-play games can offer that much content—it does provide plenty of fun. That’s probably the theme of this week’s games: strip away a game style to what makes it work. Power Hover may be too simple for some gamers, but for what it is, it works.

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Nonstop Knight

It’s funny how some of these games do exactly what the title says. Nonstop Knight is a game where the player controls a knight who runs through a dungeon, killing creatures, whether you control them or not, hence the title, Nonstop Knight. This title has more going on but that doesn’t make it a better game.

If you’ve been following Geekly’s Free Video Game Summer, you’ll know that I don’t care for games that give me little agency as a player. Nonstop Knight plays itself. Literally, you don’t have to play the game for your knight to kill goblins deep in the dungeon in which you’re crawling. It’s a game that’s on rails, and I don’t care for it. Sure, AdVenture Capitalist suffers from this a bit, too, but the player still has to make choices. If you’re logged in, you can pull off some combat moves, but Nonstop Knight doesn’t give players any meaningful choices. You don’t even control your character. Skip it.

We don’t have too many more weeks left. Hopefully, I can keep this up. Until next we meet, thanks for reading.

Geekly’s Free Video Game Summer: August 21, 2016

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Hi, guys. I didn’t forget you, I’ve just been dealing with housing issues (my house is constantly under construction) but you don’t want to know about that. You want more games. This week’s Geekly’s Free Video Game Summer is brought to you by video game versions of collectible card games. I know I cover tabletop games with my other reviews, but there are plenty of free-to-play video games that use the collectible card game model. Just to clarify, you collect cards (of varying rarity) in a collectible card game and make decks out of the cards you collect. It’s a decent game model for a free-to-play game and there are plenty of free-to-play collectible card games out there. Let’s get started.

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Final Fantasy Portal: Triple Triad

Full disclosure: there’s a lot more to the Final Fantasy Portal besides Triple Triad, but the only thing I’m covering here is Triple Triad. Ah, I loved Triple Triad in Final Fantasy VIII. It’s the collectible card game within the role playing game. Players would collect cards of characters found within the game and challenge random non-player characters to card duels. The rules are simple.

You play on a 3×3 grid. Every card has four values for each one of its sides (left, right, up, and down) and these values are printed in the upper right-hand corner of the card. You play cards in the 3×3 grid and if your card’s value on one side is greater than your opponent’s you take control of their card (kind of like Othello). Whoever owns the most cards at the end of the match wins. In the original game, players only obtained characters from Final Fantasy VIII, but Final Fantasy Portal’s version of Triple Triad includes all numbered entries in the Final Fantasy franchise and that’s a lot of fun.

The original Triple Triad weaved in elemental play—the card based on the Brothers summon had an earth element and its values were doubled against cards with a lightning element—but Final Fantasy Portal’s Triple Triad omits elements and adds same and plus to the gameplay. Same is okay; if you play a card that matches the values on cards that share two or more sides, you flip over any opponent’s cards adjacent to the card you played. Plus functions similarly to Same but you add the values of the cards on all sides and if the sum is the same, you flip over all opponent cards. I hate the Plus rule.

Plus can negate any good card you may have. If one side is an 8 and the other is a 9, all your opponent has to do is play a 2 to the 9 while playing a 3 to the 8; both sides would equal 11 and you just lost some of your best cards. You can dictate which rules you play in versus mode, so you can avoid the Plus rule and it doesn’t diminish my enjoyment of Triple Triad, but how hard would it have been to assign an element to each character? Still, Final Fantasy Portal’s Triple Triad is a faithful port of the popular Final Fantasy mini game. And wouldn’t want to construct a deck with the best characters from Final Fantasy lore? This one’s staying in my collection, but I’m not sure how often I’ll play.

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Order & Chaos Duels

On the surface, Order & Chaos Duels looks like a Hearthstone clone, but there’s more going on beneath the surface—not much but a little. Like Hearthstone, you assume control of a hero who has their own innate ability and you’re trying to knock your opponent’s hero’s health to zero. You cast minions and spells to buff your minions or debuff your opponent’s minions. All of this should sound familiar to Hearthstone fans. Order & Chaos’s twist is that it matters where you play a minion.

You have five locations (one row consisting of five spots) you can play your minions, each minion has attack and health, and if you lower your opponent’s minion to zero health in a spot or there is no minion in the spot, your minion attacks your opponent directly. This simple addition offers more strategy, and that’s a good thing, but I never felt as if I had agency in a game of Order & Chaos.

Sure, you set up your minions to defeat your enemy, but unlike Hearthstone or Magic: The Gathering, there’s no way to counter anything your opponent does—or at least these counters are few and far between. Most of the time you’ll set up your minions during your planning phase, pass the turn to your attack phase, and once you’re done attacking, your turn’s finished.

There are also alternate ways of winning in both Hearthstone and Magic: The Gathering (namely you helping your opponent run out of cards: milling their deck) that just doesn’t exist in any tangible way in Order & Chaos. The play styles don’t offer much variety either, so I’d say Order & Chaos is a pass.

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Epic Cards Battle

I’m not sure if Epic Cards Battle even qualifies as a collectible card game. Sure, you collect cards but you don’t build a deck so much as you pick your best card or two and play them ad nauseam.

If I didn’t like the lack of agency in Order & Chaos, I hate the lack of agency in Epic Cards Battle. All you do is pick the card(s) that has the best combination of attack, health, and speed and see these cards battle it out on their own with no input from the player. Some of these characters/cards have special abilities but gameplay boils down to those three statistics and whose cards have the better of those statistics. Epic Cards Battle puts more emphasis on scantily clad women than it does gameplay. If you’re into that sort of thing, Epic Cards Battle might be a decent game. If you want something more from your gaming experience, I’d skip it.

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Card Lords

Card Lords combines elements from several games in this review and it does so in a satisfying way. It could be that it deploys a similar art style as Card Wars 2 (which I’ll cover later: foreshadowing, baby) and I like that art style, but it does use the best part of Order & Chaos, which is “card placement matters.”

Akin to Epic Cards Battle, Card Lords has players select their best cards. Unlike Epic Cards Battles, it feels more like you’re building a deck, or at least assembling a team with abilities that play off each other well. There’s a lot of repetition to Card Lords’ gameplay but it’s enjoyable in small doses, and players will get small doses because Card Lords also uses the ubiquitous energy resource found in free-to-play games. You’ll play a few matches before you have to wait an hour or so—or spend money (and that’s how the developer’s get paid). But unlike most free-to-play games that use energy, you don’t have to wait long; it’s literally an hour or less.

The last element Card Lords introduces is developing your cards. You can power up your cards so they’ll gain special abilities (another thing we’ll see again in Card Wars 2) and you get a sense of developing your team/deck. You also have slightly more control in Card Lords than you do in the previous two entries (Epic Cards Battle and Order & Chaos), but it still doesn’t have as much strategy as I would like. There are few moments when you wouldn’t use your cards’ special ability as soon as it’s available to you and battles still come down to who has the best stats. Still, Card Lords is worth a look.

Cardstone

Cardstone

Cardstone is a Rogue-like dungeon crawl that just happens to use cards as its means of combat. You collect cards as you journey deeper into the dungeon, but if you die, your deck resets and you have to rebuild your deck the next time you enter the dungeon. That’s curious.

Cardstone plays more like a deck-builder game (a game with set cards and you build your deck each time you start a new game) instead of a collectible card game (a game where you build your deck over time and your deck remains the same unless you make changes to it). I like the idea of a free-to-play deck-builder game, but I’m not sure if Cardstone’s combat works as well as I would like.

Players face a new creature in the dungeon with each round. Sometimes a creature will run away if you have too high a level—you do gain levels and increase your health, even if your deck resets—but when a creature stills around, you cycle through your deck on a timer. Every three or four seconds, you draw a new card from your deck. You’ll see that card rotate on the screen until you use it or it disappears (gets discarded). This mechanism leads to players drawing healing cards when they need to deal damage and damage cards when they need healing. It doesn’t matter early in the dungeon, but the deeper you get in the dungeon, the harder your opponents get and the less likely it is you’ll get the right cards. Funny how that works. This perceived cheating by the AI makes Cardstone the most frustrating game of this bunch. I don’t know how many times I fought a creature to a first one who deals damage wins scenario, only to draw into five consecutive healing cards. Note: do not play Cardstone if you’re easily irritated.

I like Cardstone’s concept but I’m not sure how long it’ll stay in my collection. It’s another game that’s worth a look. You may find it enjoyable.

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Dengen Chronicles

I was intrigued when I first downloaded Dengen Chronicles. It’s a collectible card game, but the cards are hexagonal shaped and the board is laid out like a honeycomb. Unfortunately, there’s little to no strategy.

Like many other games in this list, the winner of Dengen Chronicles boils down to who has the best stats: attack and health. But the board factors into the equation. Character/card placement matters, but it matters in the worst possible way. During the first turn, whoever has a character/card in the top point of the star deals damage first to the first, opponent character/card located clockwise on the star. So, whoever gets to play their card/character first typically wins. Sure, the next round shifts who deals damage first to the next point clockwise on the star, but by then the damage is already done.

Dengen Chronicles overlays a convoluted element chart on the board. Each section of the honeycomb represents a specific element and only characters with that element can be played there—you get bonus attack if they have multiple copies of that element printed on their card—but all you have to do is build a deck that has a strong showing in the first, third, and fifth elements, and you can dominate most games.

The only issue with that strategy is that everyone tries to use it (player versus player) and who wins is the person who goes first. At that rate you may as well flip a coin and call heads or tails instead of playing Dengen Chronicles. For me this game is a strong pass.

CardWars

Card Wars 2

Full disclosure: there is a physical, printed version of this game and I haven’t yet played it, but I have seen Adventure Time and like the Card Wars episodes. Card Wars 2 is one of those few games where I don’t ever mute the game. John DiMaggio’s Jake the Dog walks you through the tutorial and the rest of the cast voice the characters they portray in the cartoon.

The game itself is a good representation of the Card Wars found in the animated series. They’ve got everything, including Jake’s favorite element: Corn. You can pick any element you want to play. Each element has a distinct play style, which is something that’s missing in many of the other games on this list. You can even mix-match cards from various elements to build an awesome deck, and it’s a lot of fun to experiment. Compared to the other games on this list, Card Wars 2 is a must play.

But Card Wars 2 isn’t all sunshine. It uses an energy system, which isn’t bad, and players can also upgrade their cards. I’m not against upgrading cards either but how you upgrade cards matters, and with how Card Wars 2 is set up, you could spend real-world dollars trying to upgrade your cards the preferred way. The first way you can upgrade your cards is by leveling them up. The problem with this method is that your decks are capped off at a certain numeric level, based on your player level. So if you level up your cards, you might only be able to put a 40 levels of cards in a deck, and if you have a card you want to use that’s level 40, one card could be your entire deck. The better way to upgrade your cards is to enhance them, and to do that you’ll have to collect items and merge them with your card. These items are difficult to acquire and this is where Card Wars 2 tempts players to make in-game purchases.

If you’re patient with leveling yourself up as a player and then leveling up your cards, Card Wars 2 can be enjoyable and free. If you’re impatient, you could spend a lot of real-world money or you could get frustrated. Card Wars 2 is the most enjoyable game on this list and a must play for an Adventure Time fan.

Well, I hope this longer group of games makes up for the couple of weeks I missed. Until next we meet, thanks for reading.